about ///

I love doing the work of understanding & creating.

For ~ five years I’ve been building web sites as a freelance front-end WordPress developer. I build off Roots, using Vagrant & Ansible to maintain parity between dev and production. You can check out this theme on Github!

I have a pet chicken, and every day with her is an exercise in trying to understand an alien perspective. She’s literally world famous and is way more popular than me on Instagram. Follow her!


And here’s an unconventional bio rooted in narrative because why not! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I was born in Wisconsin. My childhood mentor and best friend was an orange tabby cat named Hamilton. He taught me much. How to hustle and preserve. Mornings, I would find him window-side. He looked out upon the world and its dangers didn’t faze him the slightest. No, there was work to be done: Birds, mice, baby squirrels and other small mammals were yet living.

A gentle bang of the screen door and we were off, wading through the verdant lawns of suburban Milwaukee. An angry look and I knew I had stepped too loudly. As teacher, he was firm. Quietly we approached a suspect bush. I was to shake it. What would come out? Courage, he said, with a loud purr and brush against my legs. He would not scare and so I trusted. We entered the fray, and all the birds did flee.

Even to his last days, he stood firm to who he was. He knew that though they may be chained and bolted, doors existed to be opened. No, he never gave up. At the very end, when he was pitifully in pain, he still pulled himself to nap near his friends. This was his way.

He taught me well. I am yet of the belief that though our daily foes are many, at times nebulous and seemingly interminable or simply mundane and boring, with perseverance there is hope and in that, victory. Believe it and you too shall find doors opened, winter passed, and the cabinet of wet food re-stocked.

Big G :: King Kibble ///

call me Big G the humdinger gunslinger
ya i move like im john wayne’s dead ringer
sh*t, i just trump so fly, jump so high
and whump them mice go thump, that right
i purr in delight death be the rite
my flow like iguazu, i break through
like jesus john two-O — hell yah
make haste, small mammals to waste
it’s my modus operandi up the ante
vomit on ya carpet piss up the apartment
call me beast but yo i eat fancy feast!
a regular artist i harvest, the hit, the nip
and roll in it! some b*tches howl
i be the prowl on the street the beat
cant compete! best be understood
this my hood, my meter and measure
my life of murder for leisure.


yo, i never asked for noth’n
just a lil love’n and kibble, now
im blow’n up aint no quibble
and still no respect wont accept
think me a dog panting to defer?
yah i carry a tail and got fur
but i born on the streets
bighouse nine weeks
and they neuter me. well gee
y’all say you humane? can’t be
you spray away, release my pain
it aint easy being cat man thinks he all that
but as i ascend this imperialism will end
so say adieu gonna bend ya blue a la john yoo!
haha ya you think you high and mighty a-s-c-p-a?
well humdinger! i a-bout to torture and buffet!
ha. ha. purr purr
b*tches best defer
and respect my furrrrrr,


yo i got fur, fur, yea i got fur
them b*tches still hate but sh*t
i got friskies in every flavor, savor
your envy, it’s just elementary
yeezy weezy think they the sh*t easy
but shi*it, y’all just rich b*tches
you seek them frills, i eat my kills
ya you rodent as i pounce smooth
ya student as i pronounce truth, that
it’s you take i take egoism alright
it’s indisputable it’s business as usual
that we turn to thugs and altas shrugs
a new world order, i do murder
i do purr and consume the bieber!
ha think they better than king kibble?
don’t piddle! virtue gone republic rubicon
it’s the izzle extrajudicial the predator strikes
no vice I excise and you: and you be mice.


the cat rap by Gulliver “King Kibble” Cat
transliterated from the cat by spencer